Not looking forward to this part, especially since Mom's last years are being spent in my home, so I can't really close anything up and leave it behind. Unless I sell. Lovely to read this. Thanks for sharing
I'm reading this while I'm waiting to collect my car from the mechanic. How am I going to explain my moist eyes? Thank you for such a beautiful piece of writing. I will never forget waiting for the Salvation Army truck to come and collect the umpteen bags of clothes, family furniture, endless piles of records after packing up my oarents' house.
So beautiful. I love that it was outside in nature that you felt that there was so much to appreciate. Perhaps this is, or may be where you will feel closest to your mum. I hope you are ok. Xx
This is so beautiful and true, Sasha. "I go into each room, say quietly, goodbye, and I say it for Mum, because she couldn’t." That was how I felt on the last trip to my parents' house when we (my brother, sister and I) had finally finished clearing it. And it's so hard to know what to keep. I still have some boxes to sort through.
Look forward to reading how things evolve. I still dream about my childhood home (and my mother) nearly every night.
My heart hurts for you, reading this. My mother's belongings had already been whittled down - by divorce and then two flat moves. So what was left really did feel like the essence of her. It is now condensed down further into a big storage bag, the sort market traders use. My daughter used to wear a pair of her leggings. Throws/sofa blankets of hers are everywhere in our house, used daily.
My dad, who has dementia, has also downsized incrementally. Divorce, two moves etc. He clings to his final belongings and scraps of near illegible notes in his single room. And we will too. Xxx
I think it’s like that sometimes, particularly with dementia. A lot of my mum’s things had also been sorted and dispersed through moving into a care home. There’s something so sad and strange about it being the very last of the stuff
Not looking forward to this part, especially since Mom's last years are being spent in my home, so I can't really close anything up and leave it behind. Unless I sell. Lovely to read this. Thanks for sharing
Thank you for reading it. Perhaps your sorting and letting go might be able to be a more gentle, longer process. I hope so anyway
I'm reading this while I'm waiting to collect my car from the mechanic. How am I going to explain my moist eyes? Thank you for such a beautiful piece of writing. I will never forget waiting for the Salvation Army truck to come and collect the umpteen bags of clothes, family furniture, endless piles of records after packing up my oarents' house.
That must have been truly heart wrenching, that moment. Thank you for reading and your kind words
Loved this Sasha. In middle age I find myself thinking and feeling the same as many of the things you have beautifully conveyed.
Thank you so much Charlotte
This is such a beautiful piece, thank you for sharing Sasha.
Ah thank you Clare! And thanks for the restack
So beautiful. I love that it was outside in nature that you felt that there was so much to appreciate. Perhaps this is, or may be where you will feel closest to your mum. I hope you are ok. Xx
Thank you 🙏🏻 And yes, I have a feeling you’re right. In nature and in dancing. I am OK thank you xx
This is so beautiful and true, Sasha. "I go into each room, say quietly, goodbye, and I say it for Mum, because she couldn’t." That was how I felt on the last trip to my parents' house when we (my brother, sister and I) had finally finished clearing it. And it's so hard to know what to keep. I still have some boxes to sort through.
Look forward to reading how things evolve. I still dream about my childhood home (and my mother) nearly every night.
Thank you Wendy. It’s such a long process isn’t it? And those places and people are so much part of us still
This may be of interest to you Sasha, why are women 2x more likely to become demented than men?
https://substack.com/@jane333/note/c-71082810?r=ykfsh&utm_medium=ios&utm_source=notes-share-action
My heart hurts for you, reading this. My mother's belongings had already been whittled down - by divorce and then two flat moves. So what was left really did feel like the essence of her. It is now condensed down further into a big storage bag, the sort market traders use. My daughter used to wear a pair of her leggings. Throws/sofa blankets of hers are everywhere in our house, used daily.
My dad, who has dementia, has also downsized incrementally. Divorce, two moves etc. He clings to his final belongings and scraps of near illegible notes in his single room. And we will too. Xxx
I think it’s like that sometimes, particularly with dementia. A lot of my mum’s things had also been sorted and dispersed through moving into a care home. There’s something so sad and strange about it being the very last of the stuff
Yes, and it’s not the heart-squeeze things like salad bowls - which I totally get xx